I was joking around with someone today and stated that the first stages of moving to and living in New York City are:

1. Crying in Public
2. Drowning/Learning How to Live Under Water
3. Finally! I’ve Got the Hang of this Now
4. Just Kidding, No I Don’t

Even something as simple as getting groceries, this city makes seem next to impossible. My grocery store is literally 135 blocks away from my apartment. Beginning next month, my student loans payment (which is of an ungodly, disturbing amount) will be the same as my rent. I’ve lived here for seven months, have a college degree and my job title is “Sales Associate” in a discount retail store. Do I think about leaving? Every day. But I have a voice in the back of my head that says ‘everything happens for a reason,’ and I listen.

This past week as been unusually  stressful; I’ve cried three times at work (and remember, I work in retail–nothing is really that important). But, I’ve also talked to an unusually large amount of people with whom I’ve either attended high school or college with, that are feeling the exact same way I do with regards to life, despite the working retail or living in New York parts. A number of people I graduated with (most holding my same degree) are unhappy with their current career situation. Many have quit their first out-of-college job and/or are moving somewhere else than where they thought they would be the most happy/successful. Maybe it makes me selfish that a part of me relishes in the fact others aren’t completely happy either–but I’m chalking it up to human nature.  ;)

Right now, I’m also seeing a lot of my friends who are graduating in the upcoming months accept amazing first jobs in cool cities with awesome salaries, and I suppose that is making me second guess the moves I’ve made. I chose to move to New York City. I chose to work retail. I also chose to attend UD which, while made me have an amazing college experience, also inadvertently chose to leave me with some monumental student loans to pay off on my small retail salary. As they say, ‘sucks to suck.’

But I also know that the negative and hard things about my choices are a lot easier to see than the good ones. I live in what I still consider to be the best city in the world. I’ve met some amazing people here that I would never had the chance to meet otherwise. I work at an amazing company at which I am obsessed with and can’t wait to advance in. Many of my best friends either already live here or are planning to move here very soon. NYC is a short flight or drive away from my hometown in Ohio, so I can easily get there if I need to. I can afford to live the life I lead, under current circumstances. The opportunities in this city are amazing and endless.

Taking everything into account, I’ve realized that most of the problems I’ve been battling are personal in nature and nothing against Manhattan. NYC allows me to see Broadway shows for $27. New York lets me to pay rent that is cheaper than some of my friends pay in the Midwest. In NYC, I can travel anywhere I want, as many times I want for a whole month–for the price of a roundtrip drive from Cincinnati to Cleveland. In New York, I can get anything I want, at anytime I want–thanks to my local Duane Reade and Blendr. (Kidding about Blendr–but…even if I wasn’t…). In NYC, I have airports, museums, restaurants and fashion boutiques coming out of my ass; and it’s easy to forget how lucky I am to have such things at my fingertips. New York has been giving me ALL of the opportunities–it is I who has not been fully grasping everything that is awaiting me.

As OneRepublic would say, “This has gotta be the good life.” No matter where you live, what you do and who you surround yourself with, always remember: you make the choices in your life, everything happens for a reason and last but not least–all things are temporary.